Twisted Traditions

Having Ravenboy home for a week was very special. He finally got to meet Miles and helped us decorate for the upcoming holidays.

We have many family traditions, most of them silly and origins so obscure that they are hard to explain. One is playing cassette tapes of old Christmas LPs while we decorate our home for the upcoming Yule Tide. Many readers can probably relate to that tradition and having been raised as Christians, RGBisMe and I have plenty of great childhood memories of the tunes. Ravenboy, however, was raised in an eclectic neopagan home and will raise a questioning eyebrow at some of the traditional lyrics.

Over 2 decades ago, one lively holiday medley became the victim of an oddly choreographed dance. I don't know what possessed me to start doing this high stepping jig that looks more like a fit than anything graceful. It is so aerobic that I swear that no matter how many times that I hear it in a season, I will only perform it once. As the years passed, I added the rule that it would be only the first time I heard it during the holiday season. My annual performance is usually in the privacy of our living room but fate has also required me to perform at Toolman Luke & Maga11's. Then there was a year that I heard the strains of the medley very early in the season in a department store! Not wishing to break the tradition nor experience public humiliation, I quickly exited even though I was alone.

I think the next twist in the tradition was influenced by the recent ease of recording the event. Disposable cameras at the ready, my family would anticipate the event with glee. Digital cameras and eventually the ease of digital movies with sound made each year a little more um... humorous. I resorted to trying to put off the performance for as long as possible. One year, I hid the tapes to delay the inevitable. The next year, I hid just the tape with the energetic music. Next time I switched the labels on the tapes. Their one weakness is they forgot which tape it is every year. It always amazes me because I certainly remember. Each year the tapes are hunted out and all the songs played through until the right tape has sent me into my annual cardiac workout.

Last year, I went to great lengths. I secretly duped the tape then copied a song (I could only find on VHS)that Ravenboy hates over the original tune. Mouths gaped as they thought the song was lost forever. I pulled out the duped tape and began my performance with a grin, knowing I had "got" them.

I had no great ideas this year, no grand schemes. I was at a loss as to how to put off jumping around my living room until my chest wanted to explode. We had limited time to decorate and celebrate, RGBisMe was taking the afternoon off with that in mind. Just before he came home, Ravenboy jumped into the shower. Finally and idea came to me. I popped the offending cassette into the player and fast forwarded it to just beyond the song I wanted to avoid. The moment the shower ended, I started the tape and gently turned up the music. RGBisMe came in all smiles and our afternoon of family fun started.

When the side of the tape ended, Ravenboy made his move to flip the side and noted what tape it was. After that, both sides had seemingly played completely through. As the afternoon progressed, their annual realization that they had forgotten which tape it was played to my advantage. Ravenboy tried to logically deduce which tape it was on by looking at which labels I had erased one year. He narrowed it down to 2 tapes. I tried not to flinch when he insisted on playing the on tape again. He eyed me carefully and put in the correct tape.

I tried to make a graceful exit to get into my costume (Did I mention there is a costume?) as my family smirked in victory. I did not sprain my ankle this year, I am not in as good shape as I was last year but my heart didn't explode. They smiled down onto my prone sweating form and congratulated me on a year well danced. I love our holiday traditions.