Do Unto Others...

What extent do our actions affect others in the context of new comers to letterboxing? My personal memory includes being received warmly by jbzfarm with my first excited inquiries as to what other letterboxes might be in central PA. If they had not answered my email or had been brusk in their reply, I wonder if my current enthusiasm for letterboxing would be as strong. I might have gotten the message that letterboxing was not for me if I had been treated as an interloper, outsider or newbie.

I was recently reminded by the Stonefly of the 4Rhines what it is like to move from the role of student to mentor. The 4Rhines have some people in their area that are just becoming familiar with and interested in letterboxing. Stonefly said it was a newer experience for him to have folks reaching out for advice on the subject and he remembered when he asked the same from us. He looks back to the times he requested clarification from veteran letterboxers and uses their responses as a guide to how he treats people who are now looking to him for some instruction.

We try to take our best experiences, the ones that made us feel accepted and welcome or inspired us to keep working on some difficult clue and emulate those moments when we are in the position of sharing advice. Hopefully we learn from any negative experiences in a way that we choose not to pass them on as thorny rights of passage. There is no need to have the mind-set of, "I learned the hard way and you will too."

Striving forever to be a good student as well as a decent mentor, I can get frustrated with how I see others sometimes handle those roles. I get disappointed in people who seek letterboxes and want speedy victories and difficult clues clarified for them on the spot. Sometimes it seems they have no patience for anything that doesn't offer immediate gratification whether it be an email response or big juicy hint to mystery clues.

I also have much less regard for the type of established letterboxer who has the need to drop names. I do respect the history of letterboxing, who and how it's evolution has been shaped, and the fact that not everyone wants to participate and share their clues on the same level. I however refuse to fein interest or have a mini-orgasm over the fact that someone carved a stamp for some historic event that I have never heard of (*gasp*) or solved a set of clues that are of no interest to me. This is probably the same reason I do not like perpetuating many of the online inside jokes that not only leave new comers (to the game/group/ area) feeling left out but are tedious to whomever chooses not to be included. Opposite to the beliefs of some, I do not think such foolishness fosters camaraderie; it creates exclusive groups that frequently come across as cliques.

On a basic level, everyone wants to be accepted. We were all new once, at everything. Remember what it was like the first time you created a decent piece of artwork, solved a difficult math puzzle, or successfully hiked up a steep hill. When we can draw on those memories we have less need to draw attention to our own accomplishments and our guidance of others who are just getting excited about the game can be more supportive and less critical.